Last night That's Not My Age met Mary Portas. Actually, I'd quite like to end this post here. Maybe now I've met the high street fashion Goddess, my online work is done and I can sign off for good? Farewell dear blogosphere, it's been a blast.
But no. I have some hot news from planet fashion. According to Portas, the boyfriend jacket is over, it's all about the girlfriend jacket now. And to prove it, she was wearing a peach Celine tuxedo jacket that only a couple of days ago made an appearance on Melanie Rickey's Fashion Editor At Large blog (that's Rickey on the right):
Now I occasionally wear some of Mr That's Not My Age's jumpers but they don't look as good as this. Perhaps I could persuade him to start wearing women's tailoring? Anyway, so I met the Queen of Shops at the Greatest Fashion Show on Earth and I think I might have instantaneously developed a minor case of Tourette's Syndrome. No, I didn't swear at her (imagine that? 'Hi Mary, fuck off!') but I did get a bit starstruck and found myself blurting out, 'Ohmigod, I don't know what to say, I think I'm a bit in awe of you.' There is a reason why I don't go out much. My excuse for this unseemly behaviour? One glass of M&S champagne, severe back pain and a stupor induced by compere, George Lamb.
So this morning I would like to go and live here:
But like Eddie Izzard on his ultra-marathon I'm going to ignore the pain and carry on. Before I made a complete fool of myself I managed to ask Mary P to name her favourite outfits (from the catwalk show). 'I could have worn a lot of it,' said the style guru, ' the Uniqlo white shirt, the No Name top was stunning. The season is here for grown-up fashion.' Hoorah!
Then Melanie Rickey took a photo of me and my new best friend. I've cropped myself out, partly to maintain anonymity and partly because next to Portas who is absolutely gorgeous and has amazing skin, I looked a bit like Gordon Ramsay in a wig. Must do something about those wrinkles.
And, I say! Could that be Mary's hand on my shoulder?
As well as the girlfriend jacket, Portas is wearing an Acne t-shirt, skinny Cos trousers and Acne chocolate brown leather boots - with what could have been a post-modern Cuban heel, I couldn't see clearly in the dark and had been sycophantic enough already, I didn't want her to think I was curtsying too. The look? Grown-up rock chick with money and taste, a bit like Carine Roitfeld with a better hair cut.
That's Not My Age was incapable of stringing a sentence together - what would you say to Mary Portas?
Photos
Mary Portas: Melanie Rickey
Piet Hein Eek log cabin: Thomas Mayer
Catwalk shots: Greg Fonne Photography